Be able to laugh at yourself

Be able to laugh at yourself

When you’re self-confident, you can make fun of yourself and joke around. If you have absolutely no self-confidence, you’ll never be able to do such a thing. In most situations, you’ll have to make fun of others to try and make yourself look good. Take the example of the mega-popular video that’s going around that just went viral. Korean singer Psy’s music video: “Oppa Gangnam Style.”

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Sociotropy: term for people-pleasers

Sociotropy: term for people-pleasers

When I first started down this road, I got the term “people-pleasers” when making a search online for “how to stand up for yourself.” I realized quickly that I am a chronic people-pleaser, but there is an actual scientific term; this term is sociotropy. Wikipedia defines sociotropy as a personality trait associated with high levels of dependence and excessive need to please others.

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People-pleasers are prone to overeating

People-pleasers are prone to overeating

There is an interesting article on Time’s Heartland website: http://healthland.time.com/2012/02/02/how-people-pleasing-leads-to-overeating/ showing studies how people-pleasers tend to overeat. According to the article, people-pleasers tend to overeat to make other people feel more comfortable. It doesn’t matter if the person is hungry or not, in fact, the person could be full but will try and eat to put the other person at ease. 90% of the time, this person will regret overeating and usually faces physical discomfort later.

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Top 10 signs you are a people-pleaser

Top 10 signs you are a people-pleaser

Here are some top signs and reasons showing that you are a people-pleaser.

1. You always avoid conflict- people-pleasers hate conflict or disagreement. They will do anything they can to appease the other person. Lying and over-promising are common results of this.

2. Can’t say NO- people-pleasers cannot say “no.” Even if they are in a huge predicament and very busy at the moment, it will be easier for the people-pleaser to say yes and work hard for 12 hours straight rather than turning down a request from some stranger.

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How people-pleasing is hurting your relationship

How people-pleasing is hurting your relationship

When you are a people-pleaser, you will undoubtedly be attracted to someone that is more commanding and controlling. This is because you can’t make decisions and have little to no goal in life, so you find reassurance in someone that tells you what to do and knows where they are going in life. Also, a people-pleaser will more than likely admire the person who is commanding and domineering, because this is someone a people-pleaser could never be. Conversely, a commanding person will like a people-pleaser because he or she will do whatever he is told to do. This might work out for a while, but it will at some point go downhill, fast.

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How did I become a people-pleaser?!?

How did I become a people-pleaser?!?

How did I become a people-pleaser?!? This is a question often asked by those feeling overwhelmed when they feel like they have to meet the needs of others before themselves. People-pleasers end up being “doormats” and feel obligated to say yes to everything. People-pleasers can’t look selfish or do anything out of self interest. This makes life extremely busy and hectic, oftentimes hyperventilating when there is any trouble or conflict.  So how does one become a people-pleaser? Experts think it has to do with childhood.

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